All is well… Adolfo and I have been doing well with the exception of last Sunday. My last diary entry was ACTUALLY written on Saturday night after midnight, so it looks like I wrote it on Sunday. Well, all day Sunday Adolfo and I were not talking. I was so mad at hime. SO mad… I do not always understand WHY I feel so much anger toward him when I get like that, but it is all internal to myself. Besides, it’s all his fault.

The new page designs are coming along slowly here for my personal site. Hopefully they will generate some new interest in getting people to visit more in the future. I ahve not checked to see what my HITS have been in quite a while.

Anyway, school is going well and I am working hard on improving my grade, though I am not sure it matters how hard I am working at it. I do not think the 2 women teaching right now really appreciate my effort. Though, there are a hell of a lot of people in this class right now. I am in the middle of baking and pastry classes and I feel I am doing well… but only God knows. I need to improve my GPA.

Good night ya’ll.

More days pass… at least I am getting some sentries in. I am trying to use this diary as a means of setting things inside myself to the outside of myself. Sometimes it works and sometimes it does not. I write in it like I am trying to keep my thoughts in an understandible format. People have complained that I tend to be scattered (in the past).

Adolfo and I have been doing very well since my last entry. Today, though, we ended the evening with a misunderstanding. I encouraged him to go out and party with some of his friends and this way I could have some time alone and he could let loose a little. They were supposed to be going to Ikon and Gypsy… I think. I admit… I have this secret desire that he will bring someone back and we will have a wicked little party… like that would ever happen. DON’T GET ME WRONG… our sex has been awesome.

Money is still tight here and as rent time gets closer I am getting more and more stressed. I am not making money like I have in the past and I am getting a little worried. I get paranoid, but somehow I manage to get through. I am also starting to look for some new work, too. As much as I like SOME of the people I work with at Sur La Table I am not making the ducketts that daddy needs to make. If ya know what I mean!

I am also itching to travel very badly! urgh…. talk tomorrow maybe baby’s!

We made up yesterday afternoon… but I got mad at him again this morning and it only served to cause more tension between us. We will be fine eventually. Adolfo and I had Choclolate French Toast for breakfast using a choclate sauce that I amde from scratch.

I have a brisket marinating for dinner tonight. I also have turnip, carrots, and maybe some potatos or something???? I bought some nice pears and star fruit I want to make a desert with. I am thinking about baking the pear and garnishing it with the star fruit. Then using a caramel sauce to finish it???? What do you think?

I am hoping we will see a movie today. But, I have to have time to study as well. I need to prepare for school Monday. Yipee!

Talk soon!

Not much has been happening since I posted last. Been taking care of some business with my company and am trying to get the engine moving again there.

Adolfo and I have been doing qquite well. However, since last night we have been fighting over something kinda stupid. He said I was rude to some people whom I barely even saw and I really feel offended by that. The details would all be from my point of view, but basically there was a group of people walking along and he was trying to show me something in a shop window and I commented “these people are in the way”… the inflection of my voice was really innocent. He would have shoved me into them… but I did not even look at them except briefly in passing.

It’s turned into a silly, stupid mess. He walked out of the apartment and frankly I could care less. I made a nice breakfast this morning and he could not be bothered… fuck it! I am not going to drive myself insane over him. He owes me an apology, but cannot see it himself.

It will blow over. Whatever…

I spoke to Ian last night on-line. He is such a sexy man!!!!! He lives up in Buffolo NY… or is that Rochester? Hell, I forget. Anyway, he is a sexy man up there I could totally get into. We met in NYC back in 2000 when I was there on business. He made a mold of his huge, fat cock and made a dildo out of it. I want to get ahold it it badly!!!! Ha ha ha

Speaking of sexy men from NY… I have not talked to Chippie in a few days either. I shoud IM on Monday….

Wish me luck! xoxo Scott

Nobody wrote me about the changes?????? Grrrr… anyway…

Adolfo took me to Cheesecake Factory for dinner tonight. Yum….

I made some cosmetic changes on the site today. I think they look great… but they are strictly cosmetic. I am just trying to keep it updated and clean looking. With the end of the holidays I got rid of the winter theme action and made a plain background. What do you think?

Not much other news to report. I am home for the day and will be heading off the the gym soon. I might have some client work tonight and am struggling with other issues right now.

See, the company I am trying to build feels like it is built on tinker toys. Some important associations and business items I need are non-existant. I am troubled by financial issues and commitment from one of my team mates. I know.. if he reads this… he will be upset at me. I am venting. He knows how we are having some troubles and how important it is to be focused… but his commitments are varied.

ergh!

I am venting… school starts Monday and a guy named Daniel just called me who is my class. He is a hotty. He is looking for his books two days before school starts. I ordered my book almost 2 weeks ago and they are just arriving… HELLO? Anyway… I am off for now. xoxo

Another week has gone by and all is relatively well. I am starting to hate this job I have at Sur La Table… mostly for one reason. There is a guy there who is getting up my nose. He is the most terrible old, disasterous, malfunctioning queen. What a mess. At middle age plus he is a solid gold mess with a rich boyfriend. His BF is in decent shape, older, and has his wheels on the ground. These two are no match! At least I do not get it….

I am not being judgemental… well, I suppose I am a bit. His BF has taken a liking to Adolfo and I and I do not think that sits all that well with him. Whatever… I am looking at getting another job soon and school is starting again on Monday.

My school books have not all arrived form www.bn.com as of yet. I am still waiting for a couple of them. My classes next term are baking, Plating, and Purchasing. I suspect this is going to be the toughest term so far. The quarter that follows should be garde Marger and I am nervous about that… this is very important! I made a couple recipes from that section of my book including a mayonaise and deviled eggs. My mayo came out so nice and full of flavor. That was the way I intended it to be though. I used an olive oil instead of a clear oil. Olive oil is a flavoring agent and gave the mayo a light greenish color. Yummers.

I am struggling with bills as usual. I suppose the next year is going to be rough, but I am doing everything possible to make money. It’s nice that some people have sent me some cash to get my… thanks!

I used my birthday gift last night. I went to the Luxor spa and got a deep tissue message from jason… he is a guy I dated when I first moved here. He did such an awesome job! I had such a nice time while I was there. I arrived at 5:45… ran for a half hour or so… steam room for a while…. message for an hour… back to steam, ice water dips, scented showers, and relaxation big time. I was a cooked noodle when I left!

I also raqn into a familiar face when I was there. I ran into Brian from www.chaosinaustin.com and talked to him for a while. He was buddies with GC (www.gaycams.org) and Mikey (www.funkcamlive.com) last year when the adult web site convention was in town. Brian was a sweet guy. We talekd for a little while and he reminded of Alex and some of the other guys from the cam site I miss, too.

I used to post and have a board on gaycams, but I got into a big fight with GC… well, he deleted me off. Brian says he bans people a lot, but I lost out on talking with a lot of nice people because of the fued. Oh well… I started posting on another board… can’t tell you which though.

I need to run… they are installing a new stove in the apartment and will be replacing the washing machine today too. I have to work tonight at Sur la Table until 11… oi vay! Love you!

I am doing laundary tonight. Adolfo has the evening off and is in the bedroom watching television. He has been running hot and cold all evening long. Argh…. it is frustrating. So… I am going to ignore it and wait for the personality I like to come back into control.

Anyway, in my last entry I was talking about New Year Resolutions. My resolutions this year are to: be a nicer person and be more patient with the other idiots God put on this world to challenge me on a daily basis, to get into better shape (through a plan I am currently working on), and to get focused on my business once again.

Adolfo, on the other hand, will get his driver’s liscence and then I will nudge him into buying a car. Sometimes I get very tired of being a fucking taxi. Although I cannot say that to him without a whole new case of fucking drama.

Ugh! The guy who used to be my best frweind in high school wrote me a couple weeks ago telling me I was not making any entries into my diary for his “voyeuristic side”. So… when I looked inside I realized I was way behind. I apologize to everyone who checks in on me… is there anyone else left? Is there anyone reading this thing?

Anyway, all is well here and school is two weeks away. I was hoping to be able to go away on a trip this school break like I could on the last two. Ergh.. I may not be. I was talking to my travel buddy about it in e-mail as he is currently on a flight between Sydney and Bangkok as he told me I missed out on Amsterdam. ARGH…. I would have LOVED LOVED LOVED TO HAVE GONE THERE. Am I shouting?

Oh well… maybe another day? School is starting again on the 13th. I am worried about money as usual. School is so damn expensive. Talk soon

E-Gads! Has it really been a month since I submitted a diary entry? Well, this has beena bizzy month. I will have new pics posted as son as they are available. Adolfo and I have been through the ringer and back this month with some big ass mo-fo fights and some great make-up sessions. Ha ha ha… too much information I am sure. All in all we are lwearning a LOT about what it takes to keep a relationship. HE has been challeneged a lot by me.

We are making our new year resolutions now. I will post them tomorrow or soon when we get them figured out.

No, I did not fall off the planet. I moved in an apartment with Adolfo in the last 2 weeks and the new situation has been rocky most of the time. Adolfo is dealing with a lot of things and I learned I need to back off and let him get his head together. He has intimated a few times that he thinks our realtionship is not working out. BUT, by the next morning he is all lovey-dovey again and he apologizes for the things he said the day before. It’s been a real yo-yo here. It’s absolutely nuts at times.

Last night he worked until 11 at his second job at the Venetian and I felt very guilty about not going to pick him up. I decided to go to bed a little early because I am trying to go running in the mornings and get sleepy earlier at night. He came to bed about 1:30 and was gone this morning by 4:30!?!?!?! Man, he does not get enough sleep and I really think it is effecting him in some very bad ways.

Adolfo does not drive or have a car. I am hoping he will realize that he “needs” to take care of that, but I also realize ONLY he can decide that. I am not a taxi service.

Since the move he and I drove to see my mom as seen in the gallery. There are a couple pics from when Adolfo, Tom, and myself went to help mom with some chores around the house. The following week Mom and Bob came for Thanksgiving and stayed for a few days. I know they really love us and care about Adolfo and I. We had a lot of arguments and tried to have them privately, but mom told me she could over hear us.

The good thing is that mom and Bob took an interest and offered us, independently, some advice. I think it helped a lot. I am trying hard, but it barely seems to be enough. God knows what will happen next?

Anyway, the Christmas tree is up and I will have some new pics of that soon.