Another Day

There are a lot of days that come and go when it feels like I am literally falling into a whole. Today was like that, seems like it is happening once a week, but something always makes the landing just soft enough to to keep from getting a bloody nose.
I know I have a lot of things going on and I get a lot of good things happening, don’t get me wrong. I am grateful for every day and really have been taking a lot in the face just to get from getting up in the morning and going to bed at night.
I hope a change in energy will allow me to have a change in focus over the next couple months as I get ready for what may well be my last Burning Man. I can keep making art and I can keep involving myself with some local burner crap but I think it’s time to let go. Everything that was fulfilling got light shined onto it in the last year and the dreamkillers won.
Digressing
Well, there are these days when a lot of things are going on and somehow at the end of the day I still feel like I got beat up. Today I was home until noonish and then went to go see Harry Potter by myself. Then I had a date with a guy I met on the train yesterday who is 22 years old. He was cute, sweet, nice and very interested in me. We met today and I was not feeling ‘it’. I hung out and suggested we get some dinner and he kept tooling around, playing on his blackberry and for some reason keeping me from getting food. I ended up just walking away…
Dating? Ugh… at least not that way. I had no idea what the hell I was doing with that kid and I am just over this stupid idea of trying to date again. I am 4 freaking years out of practice… is it supposed to be hard?